"pepto is a girl"
"no it's a boy"
"but it doesn't have that part."
"are stuffed animals allowed to have that part?"

change is supposed to be good. guys being interested in you is supposed to be quote-on-quote "amazing". high school is supposed to be "the time of your life" or "where you begin to really find yourself". this is what has always been told to me. in fact, i'm even giving a little talk to some 8th graders about high school on friday. what i really want to do is crawl in a hole and hide. because when you go away to school you leave behind everything you used to think was important and step into a different world with different rules. and you come back home and change sucks more than anything you could ever imagine. it's like you were never there but they still expect you to be up-to-date on everything. and the guys that have decided to now be "in love with you" are not the ones you feel you really love. high school sucks. not everything about it though. i mean there is always that one boy in your life that you wake up for.
just to see his smile. and get so many hugs from him that his scent rubs off on your sweater. or play with his hair. that brown, hair full of gel that "you just never noticed before" because he would wear it everyday but you weren't where you couldn't get enough hugs from him a day. and during the breaks you want to just call him and when you finally get up the nerve to he's not home. so you email and talk through there. but somehow it's not enough. because really just hearing him breathe would be amazing. and people say you're "potarded". but deep down you don't know what to believe. because nothing but that image of his smile in your head makes sense anymore. nothing but his laugh and his expressions and the way he hugs you. nothing.
maybe i'm jus corny but
i dunno what is going to happen or anything about what i am supposed to feel right now. but it's not something i've felt before. and this new feeling makes me happy. but yeah. i'll admit it. so maybe i am in love. call me crazy but that's all i can come to as an explanation for all the feelings that you're making me feel. yeah. alex u told me and i didn't listen. but yeah. i'm in deep.

so i jus finished my lil discussion/presentation and it went pretty well i think. got to talk abt thurber and carter and all that stuff. got to tell em wat my friends mean to me. and basically a bunch of crap abt high school. it was iight.

do do dooooooooooo

so now here in my dad's office. jus ate lunch and my mom is up in her art rm watchin ppl take the benchmark. later i am hangin wit sum ppl watchin this faculty/student bball game. yayness!

i think this weekend i'm just going shoppin and junk. not much. i have to say bye to my bro and ppl too later today. that's gonna be eh,meh,bleh. yeah i think that covers it. well i have to go do my wrk or sumthin in the lib. and junk so leave 1 here. or send me an email if u want.

o yeah: eric chen ur amazin. hahaahahahahahahaha. i like the pix. dude. i am so sendin em to mel...

and quote- "Concept album? How can any huge project that takes up most of your life for a year not have a concept? Prog? How can any innovative, forward-thinking art or music not be progressive? It reminds me of when I first heard the label "Emo," which was the most ridiculous label ever. How can anything you put your heart and soul into not be emotional?" that's frm Omar Rodriguez-Lopez. keener sent it to me awhile back but i saw it on this guy's myspace and junk so here it is.

i go back to skool on mon. first plane leaves @ 12:30ish. tg. i jus miss ya'll of course. haha.


there's an old entry frm my xanga...

grrrrrg.
so home kinda sucks the big one rite now...o well! dude! i am going to loomis monday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am so excited. yay. i miss u guys so much. first lc person i get to see is LINH! yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"i believe the way to a man's heart is not through his stomach but a lil further south..."
"if life gives u lemons make lemonade then go see who life gave vodka and have a party!"

and becuz eric chen is SWARMING my profile ya'll get a eric story!
Ericcc425: one night
Ericcc425: i was about to sleep
Ericcc425: when i was like, wow i have good vision
Ericcc425: then i was like
Ericcc425: wait
Ericcc425: my contacts are on
Ericcc425: rofl
Ericcc425: !
Ericcc425: the end